I haven't had a free moment lately, nor as I write this, but I need to take a second to listen to the voice scolding me now. As my first Mother's Day came and went so leisurely and lovely thanks to my sweet Nate, I also had a disappointing realization that I'm not the mother I want to be to my son. I know no one is who they want to be, and I'm sure there's not a mother who thinks they are the mother they want to be, but I am not even on the path there. As I finally get to listen to the conference talks that were only words going in one ear and out the other while I lassoed Oscar away from danger, I realize I am the person Dieter F Ucthdorf is talking about when he mentions "Our 'do it switch' gets rotated to the 'later' position." Here's the talk if you heard it and retained none if it like I did.
The talk is called "Your Potential, Your Privilege," and he was addressing men, but it cut me to the core. So here I am, trying to take his advice and not "let a day go by without doing something to act on the promptings of the spirit."
In my first hectic year of being a mother, when it comes to taking care of my spirit, I've somehow unintentionally taken on a motto of "I'll do that in just a second, as soon as I get this done." By adopting this motto, I've arrived at my first Mother's day not on my way to being who I thought I wanted to be, and not on my way to my potential or benefiting from my privilege. So I'm changing my motto to "don't let a day go by without taking care of your own spirit." Hopefully in turn I will be reaching my potential in taking care of Oscar. Happy belated mother's day.
1 comment:
Oh, I love you Nichelle. Never be too hard on yourself but always cultivate the promptings of the spirit, sometimes hard to do in the chaos of life.
Little Oscar and Nate welcoming me out of the shower was a great gift on Sunday morning. Hope you got to sleep in!
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